Bila nak bersalin ni?

I've passed my 38th week now, and still no signs of labour, be it pain, show or regular contractions. Or so I think. Read through a few websites regarding twins, and mostly say that multiple pregnancies will always be delivered early. Or so they say. Guess I'm one of those extraordinary homo-sapiens (among the few percentage of women worldwide) who do not.

But since my last checkup last Tuesday, I can feel the difference within my occupied-belly. The weight, especially! According to the ultra sound scan results, Twin 1 is already 2.8kg, and Twin 2 has reached 3 kg!! That's almost 6kg, people! (assuming the readings given were accurate) Allah, help me be strong. Today has been particularly difficult for me, somehow I felt my body is a huge magnetic metal bearing the positive charge, and everything that I step on (earth, mainly) will be the negative charge. My weight seems to want to stick to the ground! Lifting a feet is such a struggle; lifting more than a few almost made me shed a few tears. That's why today I could not bring myself together to be strong for Dini, and let the bibik and my MIL look after her most of the time. I simply lied down, sleep off the pain away. For the first time, I didnt feel guilty for doing so. I find myself always thinking.. "bila nak bersalin ni?" It's gonna become a reality sooner or later, and today, I wanted it to be sooner than I thought. I was even willing to go through everything alone, without my hubby (if God does not permit), as long as I can get the boys out of me. True enough it's always better for the babies the longer they are in the womb; for natural development can take place. Caring for babies who are born prematurely can be more demanding and challenging. Allah knows best, surely. Whatever it is that I am going through, must be best for me and my family.

Twin 1's head has always faced downwards (Cephalic, or also termed as Vertex).. but twin 2 has not. Fortunately, he has turned himself to the same position as Twin 1 last week.. probably getting ready to face the world soon. When they're both in this sort of position, it would be easier for the mother (me) to deliver them normally. Lets hope they both stay that way until the right time comes. We sure would want to avoid any unnecessary complications, especially since the risk is much, much higher when involving twins delivery. According to Twins Pregnancy and Beyond, by around the 36th week of twin pregnancy, the positions of twins in the womb will not likely change. Generally because of the sheer lack of space to move around. Ya ALlah, please make it easy for me.

Sleeping also is becoming more strenuous these days. With Dini insisting on my company everytime she sleeps makes it even worse. Every toss and turn I make in order to find the most comfortable position to sleep on is deeply excruciating. To change from turning one side to the other, feels like 10kilos of weight strapped all around my waist, and having to move it ever so slowly using only the few active muscles left in.. lets see, just my tummy. My legs seem numb, my hands seem useless (for all my 10 fingers cant be bent at all nowadays!), other parts are just so exhausted from being awake since morning till night. Sigh... so this is how it feels to be carrying twins. I wonder how those carrying triplets or more do it. They must have had help... a LOT of help.

I miss my home.. I miss PJ.. I miss Ikea.. I miss Italiannies.. I miss the movies.. I miss shopping.. I miss meniaraping. :-((

Ya, ya.. sabar banyak2, tau.. saje nak express sikit, tak boleh ke? :-(